The month of April has gone by fast for me …It seems time is starting to fly by. This is something I think we all feel from time to time , or the older we get time seems to pick up the pace . This kinda bothers me as my direction isn’t quite set. I’m not the kind of person to just goes through life with no idea or direction and hope for the best. This may be needed for me , to just let down my guard for a while and experience total spontaneous life . To roll with the punches, it’s truly something I have trouble doing as I seem to need at least a minimum of direction. As for the month of April goes I had it in my head that this recovery would be over and my life would be back on course. I’m not even close to the end of this recreation if you will. I do worry about time , but really need to just live for a while and see where it takes me.
This recovery has no time limit , I also think this is the main reason others fail. We as addicts , even if we recognize we have this problem and want to abstain from abuse , we all have recurring feelings that our lives will just start-up again. I still find myself thinking ( well my programs done in 8 weeks and I’m done ) I’ll just start my life where I left off… hmm that’s not the way it can be if I want to continue being drug free. I have to Incorporate the program into my life and keep following certain rules of recovery. I do know it will get even easier than it is now , but this also scares me in a way that I will get to comfortable with my addictions and relapse. It’s kind of a double edge sword , you have to be strong enough to have the thoughts of drug abuse on your mind to a certain extent just to make sure you don’t relapse , and don’t relapse while their on your mind as this is also a vicious circle .
This blog is such an awesome tool for me , I hope this doesn’t sound negative as it’s actually doing me great things . I haven’t been this positive with my life in a long time . It’s Sunday and life is getting better for me , as my life is taking some direction , as not worrying about specific things .. Just roll with it for a while and see what it has to bring. My sister is coming today for a visit , we will have a nice time I’m sure.
Aprilis half over , my new life’s just began … My name is Tim , I’m a recovering addict and I’m the vanquisher of this addiction. Everyone I feel confident.. have a nice day .
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